What do you know...Mrs. Shelly wrote back in just a few days. I hope this wasn't because she planned her weekend around making 'thank you' cards. I don't really think so because if others received a card to their homes I believe they would have talked about how special their card was over an an other's. My class is terribly obnoxious and stubborn. Mrs. Shelly would be devastated to find out almost the whole class (except a few exceptions) made the replacement teacher felt like complete crap. They didn't deserve cards.

-Edmond

A Large Storm

There once lived a princess named Yvonne, and a vagabonding clown named Keith. A year ago, they met and fell in love- despite their differences in social status. They were happy together, they were romantic together, they learned together, and they smiled, laughed and cried together. They were each others favorite-living-human by far. Through thick and thin they fought through many dragons and terribly gigantic monsters. Together they were an unstoppable force, until a storm brew and their home clashed with the raging seas. The storm lasted three days, and when it subsided both clown and princess couldn't be found. After a month of searching, they had found that their significant other was alive, in their hearts as well...a mere storm could not divide them. The clown had asked her to be his one and only- but soon after he sadly discovered that during the past month the sea water has gotten to her head and made her very ill. He gave her his hand and promised he will nourish and comfort her, and she willingly agreed to be his forever. And thus... there is still no ending, but perhaps only faith.

-Edmond

Story of the Eye

Story of the Eye is a French novel, (translated in English) written by Georges Bataille in 1928, a man with a fascinating sexual imagination, that tells about the increasingly bizarre sexual perversions of two teenage lovers. Story of the Eye consists of several vignettes, centered around the sexual passion existing between the unnamed late adolescent male narrator and Simone, his female partner. Simone and the narrator first consummate their lust on a beach near their home, and involve Marcelle within their activity, until they run away due to the narrator's mother's dismay. Simone is a woman of pleasure, Marcelle, a friend, is a mentally ill sixteen year old girl who comes to a sad end, and Lord Edmund, is a voyeuristic, English emigre aristocrat that the group meets in Spain. Only Georges Bataille could write, of an eyeball removed from a corpse, that "the caress of the eye over the skin is so utterly, so extraordinarily gentle, and the sensation is so bizarre that it has something of a rooster's horrible crowing." Bataille has been called a "metaphysician of evil," specializing in blasphemy, profanation, and horror. The book is unashamedly surrealistic, both disgusting and fascinating, and packed with seemingly endless violations. It's certainly an underground classic, rediscovered by each new generation. A great book to read and analyze with a well-rounded lover! "I fell in love with the first cute girl that I met, who could appreciate Georges Bataille."

-Edmond

Freedom

When walking in the hallway of my school yesterday, I started to listen in to the middle of someones conversation with a teacher. Something he said particularly stuck out at me..."Why does America think EVERYONE wants political freedom?". Simple question, but it was something I kept thinking about. 'Freedom's the best' is only an opinion.


-Edmond

Axe

Axe chocolate body spray...

damn that's gross.

Whipe that shit from your face.

-Edmond

Pierre and Simone, My Centaur Siblings

The centaur and centaurette in the picture above look friendly, right? I can answer that question for you, it's yes...and that is not how my brother and sister look. They are the most foul of the race, the meanest, uncaring, ugly centaurs in the whole world. Yes I was somewhat born a pompous but that is merely a joke compared to what they are. This morning my brother, Pierre, was annoyed at me because I threw his cell phone (which happened to be aimed toward a snug couch). Yes maybe he did have reason to be mad at me, but this all began when he insulted me and wouldn't let me defend myself and give a response to his negative statements. I reasoned with him, but the only thing he cared to say was 'La-La-La', or pretending he was deaf in both ears. He sat down to play Centaur Hero ( or may I say Guitar Hero) blocking out my friendly rant about him being respectful ( if he's going to say such random negative things to let me have a chance to respond to it) which he so obviously did not give a damn about. Turning off the television made this calm conflict into an argument which led to me picking up his mobile device and chucking it at the couch, due to my sudden temporary anger. He then proceeded to sway his arms heavily in my direction, completely tearing the whole front side of the brand new shirt I was wearing, also breaking a few of the buttons off. What a ninny!

As for my sister, Simone, she slapped me across the face today when bringing her the wrong flavor of tea that she hoped for, knocking the steaming tea on to my bare skin. She is not as ugly as my brother, nor foul, because when she is in a pleasant mood she and I can share a significant conversation on books and films. Other than that I find her to be a wretched creature.

-Edmond

OF MONTREAL

Of Montreal is my most beloved band. It has been my favorite, along with the Postal Service...but they only have one album, and they broke up, so there's only so much you can listen to of them. Of Montreal is not just the catchiest of them all, but the lyrics are so fun, warm, silly, romantic and crazy. I'd suggest to any person or centaur, that this is probably the best band to share with a lover. With over 10 albums, you could never get bored! Actually...this was the only band that I found the songs to never get old, as much as I'd repeatedly listen to each song...which is a great thing. The voice of the lead singer, Kevin Barnes, is very unique and like no other...unlike most punk, emo bands that have the same boring voice in each and every track, (sadly that's sort-of like Belle and Sebastian, which is also another favorite band of mine, right below the Postal Service). Of Montreal's albums consists of each song filled with different sounds, voices, and feeling. For anyone who likes the indie genre, this should be your #1! Check them out!



I am going to an Of Montreal concert in New York City on Friday...I’m extremely excited for seeing them for my first time. I also recently found out that perhaps Kevin Barnes, or some one else in the group is going to be wearing a centaur suit. I hope they look pretty in it!


-Edmond

Meat spin

So I was at my local mall, in the apple store with a couple of friends I go to school with. Now if you're one of those people who don't like to read stories that would only be funny if you were actually there, than you should just stop reading here. Well it's fun to go to this store to gather around one computer to take pictures with cool effects...that's what we were wasting our time doing. I didn't significantly notice it, but a man came over to the computer next to ours and started to fiddle around...he then darted out of the store....no big deal, right? Not yet. About twenty seconds later the computer that the man was just at began blasting interesting hyper circus music. I was startled so I jumped in front of the computer quickly to see what was happening on the screen. It was a video of gay porn that repeated over and over again! Yes, full on, ball slapping, ass pounding, dick spinning, porn. I saw it, my face became red, and I looked over at my friends...where they all stare at me assuming I put this video on the screen that is now being viewed by all eyes around the whole store; they watch the sickening video of gay circus pornography. I've never been in such a situation...I was shocked, so I stood that for a moment looking at the people who looked at me in dismay. Now, the proper thing to do is to make myself seem as if I did not do this, because I didn't. Sadly, I didn't know how to make myself seem innocent...everyone in the store already thought I put this up, for I was the only person now in front of the computer. I threw my hands up like the police were about to shoot, and I started to yell to my friends and to the store, "it was not me...it was not me!"..."There was a man...I'm not sure what happened!"...People still stared. I was thinking of another logical way to get out of this mess, as the video of men fucking and clown music still played on. Of course, I did not make the smartest move by running out of the store...just like the man who put this video up in the first place. I looked red handed...and there was nothing I could do about it. My friends said this incident was rather funny...

-Edmond

Horoscopes

I used to be one for horoscopes, but now that's no more! For a very long time I started to think these things worked...i'd check them every day...or i'd feel incomplete. Not that i'd be afraid to leave my house, but there was this slight fear i'd be unprepared for something significant. At night i'd reflect on my daily horoscope readings and notice some similarities...it was my little fortune teller, and I needed it every morning. Often times i'd check my lovers horoscope to see how they'd feel on that day...on the days we both had some type of negativity i'd act a little cautious...I suspected maybe some disagreement that day that would start an unpleasant heated discussion. There was a long period of time that I couldn't make it online to read my daily reading, leaving my day sort-of mysterious...returning to my computer after the long break, I realised I stopped checking the horoscope. And that was fine because it made me a little kooky from time to time, and a lot of the things they said were a generalization of so many peoples day. I don't need this crap...that's why I officially got out of the habit of checking it. One thing I do do though is throw a hair brush over my shower curtain, (after my long, relaxing, centaur-like shower). If the brush were to land in the sink hole, that would mean I would have a peaceful mind the next day and night. If it were to land to the side of the sink, that would mean it will be a fine day...if it lands on the floor, that means my next day will be very stressful. This works some times, and it does not make me kooky in the head.

-Edmond

McCain & Palin

At first Sarah Palin’s accent came across to me as annoying, then when I thought of what’s really going on I became outraged…every day it became worse. First off, I find McCain to be an idiot for picking Sarah Palin as his running mate. McCain met with Palin only once before he elected her to be his vice president, he knew the other republicans that ran for president as very bright people with years of experience, just as him. McCain must have thought he was intelligent by picking a woman, because he’d receive Hillary Clinton’s support and win the race. I think if Clinton was not in the race, that McCain would have even considered Sarah Palin as the future vice president. Sarah Palin is the governor of Alaska, a house mother, supporter of pro-life (even if rape was involved), and pro-gun. She is completely not suited for office; it’s disgraceful to even think some one with so little experience and knowledge in the white house would be appointed to this ranking in office. (She had a very hard time explaining her feelings on war, the economy, and the future of the American people.) I find McCain picking Sarah Palin extremely degrading toward women, and that he only picked her so she could appeal to women across the nation ( though she is pro-life ). If McCain felt strongly about equality, and didn’t let politics corrupt him, he would have picked a running mate (perhaps Ron Paul, or Mike Huckabee) that actually knew what they wanted to do with the country, and knew how to do so. Above it all, for McCain to pick Palin shows he is not concerned about the countries future. He knows he’s old and not in great condition, and this lady, who has far from enough experience, could be a heart beat away (or McCain's heart beat!) from being the leader of the United States of America.

-Edmond